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Rambling thoughts..

This started off being about my moods lately, but I'm so scattered mentally that it really doesn't work as any one topic. So here is an insight as to how my mind works. Welp, I'm officially swinging for the sky. My mood has been all over the place for the past week. Mopey, angry, hyper,... Continue Reading →

Post-Operative Depression

Sitting in therapy the other day, I learned of a fun new thing that I may have been plagued with: post-operative depression. Because, why not? When you think of it, sedatives are a depressant. Anesthesia sedates you so well that you actually keep sleeping while your insides are taken out. (Sorry for that visual if... Continue Reading →

One Down

I did it! One surgery down and two more to go. I'm a bit shocked at this hysterectomy though. To avoid TMI, let's just say I wasn't expecting to have four good-sized incisions on my stomach. And they're glued shut, no stitches, which only makes me more nervous about messing them up. I'm also sore,... Continue Reading →

A Definite Low

Well the question as to where my moods were heading has been answered. I am low. And I hate it. I have no energy, everything hurts, but the worst part is that I can't enjoy my last couple days before surgery. I'm having a surgery tomorrow and another one four weeks later. I'm going to... Continue Reading →

Summer Fun *sarcasm

I've had surgery for a hysterectomy planned for this summer for a few months, and the big day is only three days away. I'm a nervous wreck. To add to the stress, my other surgeon wants to do a mastectomy at the end of June. So, in a month. For those of you who are... Continue Reading →

Last Year

Last year is a very hard subject for me to talk about. I was at my lowest point at this time last year. Memorial day weekend of '19, and I tried to kill myself. After having been manic off and on for almost a year, I crashed. The worst low I've ever had. I had... Continue Reading →

Patience and Parenting

As a mother of three patience is something that is crucial in my day-to-day life. We suspect my first daughter may have ADHD, our middle daughter has diagnosed Autism disorder, and the youngest is entering her second round of testing for Autism after scoring too high on the Autism screening. In other words, it's a... Continue Reading →

Absent-mindedness

Every once in a while people will experience absent-mindedness. It sucks, but it happens. Maybe you just have a moment of it from time to time, maybe you have a whole day of it. It usually comes in three forms: forgetting stuff, focusing on one thing and becoming oblivious to those around you, or not... Continue Reading →

When Progress is Suspicious

I've been surprisingly efficient lately, which of course begs the question: Am I Manic? My manics are terrifying. I talk nonstop at an incredible high speed. I only think of myself, I am incapable of empathy. Yes, kinda like a sociopath. I can't sit still, I feel none of my usual pain that keeps me... Continue Reading →

Medicine Rant

The amount of medicine I'm on, in my opinion, is ridiculous. I also know individuals who take much more, so I am lucky in many ways. But that doesn't help me when I empty the medicine box section into my hand. Seven pills in the morning and seven pills at night have been my norm.... Continue Reading →

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